Reflecting on hardship

Over the last year, I’ve been reading about stoic philosophers, some modern ones and some ancient ones.

It is a is a topic that I think has been more influential on modern culture than we realise. For example, Viktor Frankl, psychiatrist, Holocaust survivor and author of Man’s Search for Meaning) says Stoicism was an important influence in developing Logotherapy. And, Aaron Beck, the creator of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) said that: “The philosophical origins of cognitive therapy can be traced back to the Stoic philosophers.”

I’ve also read some of Ryan Holiday’s books. I think he’s done a good job of translating stoic philosophy into accessible and modern teaching. I also read the wonderful How to Think Like a Roman Emperor by cognitive psychotherapist Donald Robertson. He weaves the life and philosophy of Marcus Aurelius together to provide a modern-day guide to stoic wisdom as a path to achieving fulfilment and emotional resilience.

One of the most famous examples of stoic practice that gets referenced in books and podcasts about stoicism is the story of James Stockdale who survived the prisoner-of-war camp known the Hanoi Hilton where he was a commanding officer of during the Vietnam War. Massimo Pigliucci wrote about it in How to Be a Stoic. He wrote, “Eventually, Stockdale was released and came back to the United States, in horrible physical condition. He began to recover, however, and in 1976 he was awarded the Medal of Honor, the highest military recognition, given for acts of valor above and beyond the call of duty. When he was asked in an interview who didn’t make it out of the Hanoi Hilton, Stockdale replied:

Oh, that’s easy, the optimists.

Oh, they were the ones who said, ‘We’re going to be out by Christmas.’ And Christmas would come, and Christmas would go. Then they’d say, ‘We’re going to be out by Easter.’ And Easter would come, and Easter would go. And then Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again. And they died of a broken heart. . . . This is a very important lesson. You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end — which you can never afford to lose — with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.

This became known as the Stockdale Paradox. The lesson behind the paradox is to let go of naive optimism and ground it in reality. For me that means affirming my faith that everything will work out in the end while at the same time having the discipline to confront the brutal facts of my reality, whatever they may be.

May you have the strength and honesty to confront the brutal facts.